About the Importance of
Human Values in Society

by Umberto Frascati
(Ticino, Switzerland )

Umberto Frascati

Umberto Frascati

Dear Friends,

I wish to share with you this article on Promoting Human Values.
It could be ground for some exchange of views.

World Sai Friends; Sai Frieds in UNITY

Promoting Education in Human Values
in the Regular Mathematics Classroom
by Margaret Taplin, Centre for Research in Distance & Adult Education, The Open University of Hong Kong

Introduction
In the past, human values have been regarded as the basis of society in civilisations throughout the world, regardless of their religious or cultural beliefs. These values include:

*development of general knowledge, common sense and problem-solving skills;
*perseverance in the face of difficulties;
*unity, co-operation and team-work to achieve common goals;
*tolerance, understanding and accepting differences between individuals:
*honesty and truthfulness;
*inner harmony and outer peace as fundamental ways of getting to create peace on a wider scale - between family members and friends, between neighbours, regions and countries;
*compassion for other beings (human, animal or plant),
*giving time and effort to others willingly and without any expectation of physical or emotional reward;

In recent times there appears to have been a swing away from these values, as people have become more concerned with materialism, power and self.

For the many reasons outlined below, the state of society - in Hong Kong as well as globally - has reached a stage where it is more critical than ever to educate people in traditional values (see Table 1 for examples) that have been lost and forgotten over time. Many writers have documented concerns about the rapidly rising occurrences of violence, crime, drug taking amongst adolescents and adults (Lockwood, 1993), and the corresponding decline in respect for authority, politeness, and concern for themselves and others (Lockwood, 1993).

In recent years there has been considerable discussion about whether it is the responsibility of schools to impart values education and those who have tried to do so have often been regarded with suspicion (Jennings and Nelson, 1996). On the other hand, there is the argument that it is impossible for teachers to avoid imparting values in some way (Newman, 1994) and so therefore the issue becomes how it should best be done rather than whether it should be (Carbone, 1991; Carr, 1997).

There is growing pressure for all teachers to become teachers of values, through modelling, discussing and critiquing values-related issues (Noddings, 1991; 1995a; 1995b; 1995c; Jennings et al., 1996; Lockwood, 1993). Education can no longer be concerned solely with academic achievement because even this is not possible if children do not know how to care for others and be cared for by others (Noddings, 1995c). In fact, while the survival of society is dependent upon people who are literate, numerate and able to cope with solving the problems of day-to- day life.

Our society does not need to make its children first in the world in mathematics and science. It needs to care for its children - to reduce violence, to respect honest work of every kind, to reward excellence at every level, to ensure a place for every child and emerging adult in the economic and social world, to produce people who can care competently for their own families and contribute effectively to their communities (Noddings, 1995a, p.365).

With breakdowns in traditional family structures, it is no longer the case that commonly- accepted values are passed from one generation to the next (Carr, 1997). Therefore the responsibility is falling more and more on schools to fulfil this role - and yet it continues to be difficult for them to do so, particularly with increasing pressures to achieve high test scores even in primary schools (Noddings, 1995a).
==================================================
*Author's Bio:
Umberto Frascati, International Advisor at Harley Dikkinson

I am the Chairman of a Cultural Committee part of a World Foundation and I have organized several Concerts with the Saisymphony an International Symphonic Orchestra formed by musicians of over 30 countries .

My main interest today is dedicated to a new approach to Educational Programs (adults and children).
The main goal of these Educational Programs
to promote to society the message : that education is not merely " to make a good living" but it should be.. "for our life", ( in other words Education has to build our character, in order to ensure real quality value in our lives).

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You're Already Successful, Silly!

by Lisa Irby
(Canada)

You're Already Successful, Silly!
By http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Lisa_IrbyLisa Irby

You hear the word "success" on a regular basis. People use it in reference to jobs, relationships, sports, and even to measure someone's life as a whole.

We are all successful in some way, shape or form. It's just that some people may succeed in one area while others succeed in another. The problem comes in when we play the comparison game.

How many times have you thought about a friend who possesses something you would like to have, and believed they were more successful than you because of it? Perhaps it even made you feel like a failure because you don't feel you measure up.

My question to you is, "Why are you using THEIR life as a benchmark to measure your own?"

Even though we may not be aware of this, we are often taught to define our own success in life by comparing ourselves to other people. It's great to admire someone for what they've done, but don't discount yourself in the process. People also tend to look at success as a black and white term - either you are or you aren't.

Success can come in all different areas of your life. Maybe you're a great father, cook or friend. Perhaps you have the gift of being a good listener and encouraging others when they are down. That's YOUR success story.

I am not the best public speaker, or the best athlete. I'm also not the best cook or the best gardener. However, as I've gone through life, I've found things that I am good at and focus on them instead of comparing myself to others.

I am a great writer and have a gift for helping people create and make money with their websites online. That's one of the things I enjoy doing and it makes me happy.

We all have a success story inside of us, and I challenge you to find yours and *OWN* it. It's what makes you, YOU! When you already believe you are successful, your perspective in life changes for the better.

Here's to your success! *cheers*

Lisa Irby is the Affiliate Manager for SiteSell.com. She has helped hundreds of "newbies" create a profitble website through her online tutorials. If you're looking for a SUCCESSFUL online business or a way to make some extra money on the Internet, join the free 5 Pillar Affiliate program at http://affiliates.sitesell.com - it's a program that stands for success

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?Youre-Already-Successful,-Silly!&id=243804 You're Already Successful, Silly!

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Slow Dance, Poem written by a Teenager with Cancer

by Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor
(Bronx, New York)

This is a poem written by a teenager with cancer.

She wants to see how many people get her poem. It is quite the poem. Please pass it on.

This poem was written by a terminally ill young girl in a New York Hospital. It was sent by a medical doctor; Make sure to read what is in the closing statement, AFTER THE POEM.
======================================================
SLOW DANCE

Have you ever watched kids On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down. Don't dance so fast.
Time is short; The music won't last.

Do you run through each day On the fly? When they ask, How are you? Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, Do you lie in your bed? With the next hundred chores, Running through your head?

You'd better slow down; Don't dance so fast. Time is short...The music won't last.

Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say, Hi!

You'd better slow down; Don't dance so fast. Time is short...The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere, You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day, It is like an unopened gift....thrown away.

Life is not a race...Do take it slower.
Hear the music, Before the song is over.
=======================================================
Dear All:
PLEASE pass this mail on to everyone you know - even to those you don't know! It is the request of a special girl who will soon leave this world due to cancer.

This young girl has 6 months left to live,
and as her dying wish, she wanted to send a letter telling everyone to live their life to the fullest, since she never will.

She'll never make it to prom, graduate from high school,
or get married and have a family of her own.

By sharing this Poem with as many people as
possible, you can give her and her family a little hope, because with every name that this is sent to, The American Cancer Society will donate 3 cents per name
to her treatment and recovery plan.

One guy sent this to 500 people! So I know that we can at least send it to 5 or 6. It's not even your money, just your time!

PLEASE PASS ON AS A LAST REQUEST:

Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor
Department of Developmental and
Molecular Biology
1300 Morris Park Avenue
Bronx, New York 10461

Please pass this on.

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Footprints In The Sand

by Carolyn Carty
(USA)

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed He was walking along the beach with the LORD. Across the sky flashed scenes from His life.

For each scene He noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonging to Him and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of His life flashed before Him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of His life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times of His life.

This really bothered Him and He questioned the LORD about it. LORD you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way.

But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me.

The LORD replied, my precious, precious child, I Love you and I would never leave you!

During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.

***Carolyn Carty, 1963

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Infolinks "Related Tags" helped me to Dream Like a Billionaire!

by Andre V. Milteer, M.A.
(Central Texas, USA)

An Infolinks Affiliate Publisher

An Infolinks Affiliate Publisher

Infolinks is a Dream-Maker for Web Publishers! Why, because publishers can now give our visitors great contextual information via in-text ad linking. Have I lost you? Ok, let me put it this way...Infolinks' wizardry helped me to dream like a Billionaire.

Infolinks is the Web Publishing Industry's best revenue share program. They help 1000's of publishers to turn their web-content into money. Their Related Tags widget, upon implementation, increased my week-2-date revenue by Two-Hundred-Twenty-Three PERCENT! No foolin...

But back to my Billionaire-like Dream. Infolinks is all about info-mation, right? Of course, so I drifted off and began to dream about information, information, information. What if I could (I'm in my dream-state now as I speak) gather up all of the information that is contained within all of the volumes and volumes and volumes of books ever published.

My eyes are bloodshot; my feet are blistered from walking from library to library to library in search of information.

My door bells rings; I get up to answer. There's a company representative at my door from Infolinks, Inc. The company heard about my blood thirty quest for billionaire-like knowledge attainment--they must have heard about me in a similar dream as well. The Gentleman said, I'm here to help you to realize your dream (no pun intended). I asked, HOW?

He asked if I had a computer. Do I have a computer? Well, I'm a Web publisher...aren't I? Of course, I do.

Together, we visited a well-known and prominent yet nameless website. The site had Great Content! Moreover, there were relevant contextual keyworded (hyperlink) Infolinks Related Tags. Sure enough, there were two hyperlink tags that caught my eye. One was of course, BILLIONAIRE; the other, was knowledge. My right hand guided the computer mouse over the Related tag keyword link displaying the word, KNOWLEDGE.

Much, much, much to my surprise, an advertisement popped up within a new window. What did it say? It displayed the words and images of the Amazon Kindle with built-in WiFi. Scratching my head, I began to put two and two together.

Infolinks was suggesting, via the site's Related Tags, that I consider investigating and researching the possibility of acquiring a Kindle for my Knowledge quest. After all, The Lone Ranger had Tanto; Green Hornet had Kato. And Little Timmy had Lassie. It made perfect sense that I should have a Kindle.

Next thing I remember, my wife was kicking me. Seems as though I was screaming KINDLE...INFOLINKS...RELATED-TAGS at the top of my lungs during the night while in bed. The screams prevented her from getting a good night's sleep.

As great as Infolinks' Related Tags technology is, coupled with their Easy (Javascript) implementation, she wasn't feel'in it. She gave me two choices: Either I shut up about Infolinks, or find another bed to sleep in.

I say, Who cares...I've got Infolinks' Related Tags technology and a Brand New (Amazon) Kindle. Life doesn't get any better than that!

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Don't Die Before Eating Tomato Puddin

by Andre V Milteer, M.A.
(Central Texas, USA)

Aunt Mable's Tomato Puddin

Aunt Mable's Tomato Puddin

Tomato Puddin--yes, puddin without the 'G' is True Love. We're not talking food here...its love. Tomato Puddin is a Southern Comfort that most Westerners have never heard of--much less tasted.

Tomato Puddin is made with tomatoes, of course. However, the real love comes from the butter and sugar. The recipe is somewhat vague...passed down via word-of-mouth from generational woman-to-girl; and girl/woman grown-up to the next little girl within the generational chain. Alas, the Tomato Puddin gets either better or worse, yet never remains the same.

My Mom made her Tomato Puddin starchy and thick. She must've added baker?s yeast or something. Her Tomato Puddin looked like a red Sponge Bob cartoon character. Served up with some boiled white potatoes plus a roasted beef chuck roast, it was a Sunday favorite in my childhood home.

Fast forward to October 2010. I visited my 98 year old aunt...Aunt Mable (my grandmother's sister). During my short visit, Aunt Mable served up broiled chicken wings, butter beans and corn. Dessert was a yellow layer cake with apple jelly icing. But the piece de resistance was...yep, Tomato Puddin.

I feasted upon the meal; Tomato Puddin so hot it burned not only my lip was my throat going down. My only speaking during the feast was Umm, Uhh, Ahh...Pure ecstasy; Pure Love.

Whatever you're doing; wherever you are, STOP! Go back home to your roots. Eat some Tomato Puddin or whatever your Momma cooked up special. Don't Die Before Eating Tomato Puddin!

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What You See is What You Get

by Andre V Milteer, M.A.
(Central Texas, USA)

Andre V Milteer, M.A.

Andre V Milteer, M.A.

Today, I had the pleasure to speak to a group of 10 Amazing Young People. These individuals had met some difficult life challenges. Yet, 9:00 am, there they were; listening to my speech. I was followed by two other Incredible Speakers in their own right.

A common theme was Encouragement, Positive Thinking, and Deep Faith in God. I was blown away that all three speakers, me included, were on the same page of music. I wasn't the only one dwelling on this theme. Hey, maybe there's more to this way of thinking; I thought to myself.

Foundational to any success in work, life, or love, begins and ends with a Positive self-image. This concept has been around for years. Brian Tracy calls it, The Law of Self-Concept. Whatever, ya wanna call it; three speakers were preaching and teaching the exact same message.

What I find most amazing, is that we are not sabotaged by our status, breaks, or background. We are done in by us...the stuff between our two ears. Our thinking hurts our success more than any other phenomenon. Some have referred to this thinking style as Stinkin Thinking.

Lastly, I invite all of you, to work on your faith in the power of the intangible...what cannot be realized by touch/taste/smell.

Faith believes that something will come into the tangible (realness) even before it happens. This Vision is a Power as manifested by the depth of one's imagination. Then we pull that faith and mix it with hard work. Finally, we connect and incorporate with the Divine...Our God and Source. Things will begin to happen...truly!

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Are Your Beliefs Your Friend or Foe?

by Diane England, Ph.D.
(USA)

Self Improvement (Free) Newsletters

Self Improvement (Free) Newsletters

Article excerpt from the Official Guide to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Are you aware that you operate under certain beliefs and assumptions that help you to make sense of this world and your life experiences, and that also guide you as you maneuver through each day?

Perhaps you're very much aware of the fact that you have such a framework...often referred to as a world view. For example, you may believe that you were put on this earth for a God-given purpose. Hence, you?re striving to understand and adhere to what that purpose is. You?re open to examining things that happen to you because you believe they have lessons to teach you and indeed, may be guiding you towards new directions you need to now be taking.

You may also deal with life's problems and setbacks well because you see them as developing your ability to cope with what may yet lie ahead on this path you believe you're being asked to follow by a higher power that you may refer to as your higher self, the universe, or God, for example. Furthermore, you may believe that even tragedy offers newfound opportunity if you?ll but look for it and seize it.

Hand-Me-Down Beliefs or Your Own?

Even if you can not relate to what you?ve just read, you?re undoubtedly operating in accordance with certain beliefs and assumptions?likely handed down by significant adults during your childhood. Then again, they could come from conclusions you drew as a result of experiences during that phase of your life.

Since the smoothness of your early life was largely dependent upon your ability to please the significant adults in your life, or to adopt and live in accordance with their beliefs, it is not surprising that you operate automatically in accordance with these beliefs.

Also, since it is important that, as citizens of this country we all adhere to certain beliefs so as to remain productive and law-abiding members of our society, it has likely been helpful that you've clung to beliefs taught by teachers and others.

Still, while there are guidelines as to what is considered reasonable or rational thinking and behavior within our country, there is nevertheless a considerable range of beliefs and assumptions under which you could operate and still remain an upstanding citizen of both our country and the world.

Sure, there may be some folks out there who will judge you as unreasonable for clinging to beliefs and assumptions that clash with their own. But just because they don't realize that by being open to evaluating their beliefs and assumptions, or by modifying their personal world view, that their lives could offer them more possibilities than they can imagine for themselves today, that doesn?t mean that you shouldn't do so.

That said, even if you have been operating under a world view that you believe has been serving you well, it may be time to re-evaluate its appropriateness for both your life today and where you want to be tomorrow. After all, these are challenging times for many people throughout the world.

You may need to change up some beliefs and assumptions so you can still notice and embrace life's possibilities at a time when negativity may seem ready to engulf you. On another note, if you have doubts about continuing to walk the path you were committed to previously, it may be time to consider some remodeling.

You may become more self-aware by striving to continually examine your thoughts, your emotions, and your behaviors. So, shall we look more closely as to how you can use these to direct you in ways you've perhaps not considered before?

Listening to your Mind or Not?

Many people experience their minds as something akin to committees of people chattering and arguing anyway in their heads. They hardly know how to proceed because of all the conflicting messages their minds feed them. Hopefully, though, this is not your situation?or that you have a somewhat calmer mind most of the time, at least.

Assuming this to be the case, or that typically one thought at a time seems to jump forth, you may still be wondering if you should listen to it or not. In other words, should you trust that all thoughts that come to mind are essentially your friends and hence, will serve you well?

People who suffer from the mental disorder, schizophrenia, often come to realize that their minds feed them many thoughts that need to be disregarded. Someone who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder, on the other hand, may believe that his thoughts (the majority of narcissists are men) are perfectly fine while indeed, they create havoc and emotional pain for those who must interact with him or who suffer the consequences of his choices made as a businessman, for instance.

The person who develops Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD following a traumatic event may have once been able to trust his or her thoughts, but now realizes because the brain was changed by trauma, it is no longer a good idea to do so that whereas some of the individual's thinking may be right on, other thoughts fall into that category known in twelve-step programs as "Stinkin Thinkin" instead.

Even if you have a calm brain and a world view that has served you well, just as you may want to stay attuned to the functioning of your seemingly well-running car, you'll want to review your automatic thoughts and how they're continuing to serve you. After all, thoughts can fuel emotions that can fuel behaviors that may prove detrimental and take you away from the path you intended to follow.

Let's look at an example of this, shall we? Justin and his Relationship with his Verbally Abusive Boss...

Let's say that I know a man named Justin who continually feels angry at the put-downs of a verbally abusive boss because Justin knows these simply are not true. Nonetheless, in his mind, Justin keeps thinking or telling himself that he has no choice but to accept his boss's verbal abuse because he could never find another job, or develop a business, that would provide the income he currently makes and furthermore, he is absolutely convinced he needs to survive financially, too.

Justin has strived to control his thoughts in such a way as to help him cope with a difficult situation and he has successfully done so for awhile now. However, in recent weeks, he has become aware of even more constant churning sensations in his stomach. And the truth is, they have become more vicious during the past week. But then, the extent of Justin's boss' abuse has been worsening not only towards Justin, but towards all the people his boss supervises. But then, this executive is an equal opportunity abuser.

Justin may want to stop and think about what his anxiety may be trying to tell him. Could it be there to awaken him to the fact that this is a very destructive situation? That it may be time to face his fears and move on nonetheless since this job and this boss are just too destructive to his well-being?

In fact, how can he live in accordance with his highest self; how can Justin let this self shine forth when he is being verbally and emotionally abused regularly by another? It is nearly impossible for most people. So, would it be preferable for Justin to give himself an opportunity to experience something better?

Are You seeking to Understand the Lessons to be Learned from Your Emotional Reactions?

Can you now better appreciate how important it is to pay attention to your emotional responses and any messages they may be seeking to deliver? Remember, your emotions can be a warning system?there to help protect you or remind you that there are changes you need to be making to move forth with your life and purpose.

The anxiety or emotional pain, for example, may become severe enough that they seem impossible to ignore because, indeed, you aren't supposed to be ignoring them! They are there to awaken you to the fact it is time to take action to make some changes in yourself or your life.

What you want to strive for instead is a balance between emotion and thinking. In other words, do not subtract either from the equation but instead, evaluate both your thoughts and your feelings regularly to become more self-aware. Hopefully, now you'll be more capable of keeping your beliefs, thoughts, and emotions aligned so that they continually lead you toward a purpose-filled life. After all, you should soon feel calmer and hence, be better attuned to any inner guidance or you'll perceive and seize opportunities put before you that you were undoubtedly inclined to miss when you weren't so self-aware.

Self Improvement Newsletter - Improve Your Life Today!Contains powerful articles, motivational quotes, product & book reviews covering Goal Setting, Empowerment, Success, Relationships, Health, Prosperity & More...Free Self Improvement Newsletters!Join Over 200K subscribers on a journey towards greater success...absolutely free!

Author's Bio: Dr. Diane England, Self-Growth?s Official Guide to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, is a licensed clinical social worker who is also the author of The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Relationship: How to Support Your Partner and Keep Your Relationship Healthy. Additional Resources on Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder can be found at:
*Website Directory for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
*Articles on Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
*Products for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
*Discussion Boards
*Dr. Diane England, The Official Guide to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

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Makeover Your Career

by E. Quinn
(CaliforniaPsychics.com)

Makeover Your Career in 5 easy steps, by E. Quinn of California-Psychics.com

"For years, I hated every job I had," says Olivia (not her real name), who began working for newspapers soon after she graduated from college. The 34-year-old San Francisco resident says she would sit around at work wondering what she'd be doing if she didn't have to be there. "I always worked hard, though, because I kept thinking a promotion would change everything."

She eventually worked her way up to a job as an arts editor. "I kept thinking, 'This is my dream job, I'm supposed to love it,' but I just didn't. And to make matters worse, my promotions didn't come with much of a pay raise. I was making so little money that I still couldn't make a dent in my student loans."

Sound familiar? If you feel numb, bored, or resentful during much of your workday, it's time for a change. To make it happen, follow these five tips to spiritually transform your life:


1. Dream a Little Dream
Spend time fantasizing about your career path. What job would be utterly delightful for you? How much income would you need to feel at peace about money? To make her fantasies concrete, Olivia chose to create a collage of photos to depict a new career and to inspire her whenever she felt stuck in her old job.

2. Be Happy
Olivia loved to write, but she wasn't using her skills in a way that brought her fulfillment. Eventually, she consulted a psychic, who told her that she was destined to be a creative writer and teacher.

Actually, Olivia thought the idea of becoming a teacher sounded awful (standing in front of a class, disciplining students), but she did long to immerse herself in creative writing. Even though going back to school would mean leaving a stable job and going into debt, Olivia began applying to creative writing programs.

3. Act Out
"Going to grad school felt like taking a vacation," Olivia remembers. "It was this huge leap into the unknown, but I just wanted to do it. It felt right." Feelings of joy, pleasure, and excitement are all signs that you are on your life path. Do everything you can think of that gives you those feelings -- take up the saxophone, climb Mt. Everest, or go out clubbing.

Who knows? Maybe one of those activities holds a future career path for you. In any case, once you get used to acting on your joyful impulses, you'll be able to recognize them when they're prompting you toward a career change.

4. Baby Steps
People do sometimes make quantum leaps forward, but most of us progress step-by-step. You may feel impatient as you go about making a career change, but by taking smaller steps, when you find yourself losing inspiration, you may be more willing to revise your goals to avoid another career rut.

Do one small thing a day to inch you towards your goal (make a phone call, write an email, read an article online). By the end of the month, you will have done 30 things.

5. Be Open
"When I went back to school, somehow I didn't realize that I'd be required to teach in order to finish the degree," Olivia says. "I thought it would be horrible, but I didn't have a choice. I ended up teaching a creative writing workshop, and I loved it! I was totally shocked."

Today, Olivia has her master's degree in creative writing and works part-time as a writing teacher -- a job she loves -- and she's making more money than she did at the paper.

You deserve to be well-compensated for your time and talents. When you are at work, you are devoting a part of your life to that job. Don't settle for low pay unless the job compensates you in other truly meaningful ways.

If you believe in your own worth, you'll gravitate towards work that pays you well.

**Ms Quinn is a renowed Psychic. Reach her via www.californiapsychics.com**

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3 Proven Steps to Eliminating Your F.E.A.R. Of Public Speaking

by Andre V Milteer, M.A.
(Texas, USA)

Andre V. Milteer, M.A.

Andre V. Milteer, M.A.

Your F.E.A.R.
How many of us have an INTENSE fear of public speaking. A Show of hands, Please…

If you all don’t experience f.e.a.r. when speaking, you’re either lying to yourselves or to lying to yourselves. Truth is, I have an INTENSE f.e.a.r. of public speaking. Indulge me for the next few minutes while I lead us down the path of the exploration of f.e.a.r.

The Dark side of Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

Darkness has been linked to evil, bad, and negative events. True or True? Ok…so let me ask, where does this come from. Answer, Our Childhood…Freud’s ultimate psycho-sexual stages of development. Let me tell you all a story…May I?

Once upon a time (1965), there was a little 5 y/o boy. One guess who that boy was…ME! The boy was asked to give a graduation speech by his kindergarten teacher. Of course, the little boy replied, I’m scared; Teacher…But I’ll do it for you!

The boy, aka ME, practiced and practiced until he had the speech “down cold.” His dress rehearsals were hitch less upon drilling in front of peers within the kindergarten house. Until the day of…

The Boy was transported to a Large building. The building has a marquis...the boy was very smart, and read the words, BOOKER…T…WASHINGTON…HIGH SCHOOL. Yes, y’all are correct; the boy’s speech was to be delivered within the High School Auditorium. For you see, The Boy was the Valedictorian.

The Seeds of Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

The Boy was frightened…Scratch that, HE WAS TERRIFIED. The stage was monstrous; the auditorium was Vast and dark (there’s that word again, DARK). And to top it off, the boy was required to deliver the Keynote (he hadn’t rehearsed the sequence). The Boy went out, faced the crowd, began crying, and FROZE. Then, the ultimate symbol of f.e.a.r. and embarrassment occurred. He literally… wet his pants…pause for effect

Just What is F.e.a.r.?

Granted, most would-be speakers don’t experience this type of trauma…This type of what_______? Yet ALL experience some degree of f.e.a.r. What is f.e.a.r.? Definitions anyone_____? Here is mine: False Evidence Appearing Real. Also within this category, I must include Fear’s Ugly Twin Sisters, Doubt, and Worry (sorry ladies; no offense intended). Motivational Speaker, Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup Book series co-author) terms the F in f.e.a.r. as Fantasizing, E..A.R. In other words, DOUBT & WORRY. In others words, What Folks, _____! Thank-you.

What are we worried about?
1) Forgetting our speech?
2) Losing our nerve?
3) Looking Stupid…
How about this one, peeing in our…Ok, worst case scenario, one or ALL of the above happens! Sure, we’re devastated and embarrassed. Yet, it’s within moments such as these, that we grow and excel…provided, we neuro-linguistically re-frame this Significant Emotional Event (SEE) as an opportunity vs. disaster. (Easier said than done…agreed?)

Let Me Tell You The Parable of Satan and St. Peter

Way back in the bowels of time, Satan and St. Peter were having a conversation about the Temptation of Man. St. Peter postulated the merits of (Hu)Mankind’s redemption, acceptance, and everlasting place with the Kingdom of Heaven. Satan, fortified his position by accentuating Man’s weakness, temptation, and selfishness.

St. Peter wasn’t swayed, annoyed, nor afraid…for He knew that his powers were superior to that of Satan. Moreover, Satan remained confident, because he had a secret and very potent weapon within his arsenal. As a source of pride and vanity, Satan decided to share his secret with St. Peter. So without hesitation, he began…
Of all the powers, tricks, and allure that I could use to capture the Soul of Man, there are only TWO that I rely most upon. Yes, they are my Pride & Joy. And, they are…

FEAR and her Ugly Twin Sister, DOUBT. For you see, once I’m able to plant these seeds into the Thoughts of Man, my work is done. Because, you see, I can simply sit back and relax. (Hu)Man him/herself, will themselves, be the cause of their Own undoing.

The 3 Step Formulas for Conquering Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

How many, via show-of-hands, believe that we could spend an entire day, week, month, year, or lifetime exploring strategies and drills to overcome public speaking f.e.a.r. Yes, of course we could. Yet, how many minutes do we actually have right now…Anyone____5-7__?

So, here’s the secret bottled sauce formula to conquering public speaking f.e.a.r. in 3 easy steps. Everyone Ready?
1) P
2) P
3) P
Sum Total= 3…Yes, It’s the 3 P’s. Go back to my earlier analogy/demonstration of the little boy wetting… A wise old {Toastmaster} once said, “Piss-Poor Planning leads to Piss-Poor Performance.” Stated in an other fashion, I give you, Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance.

The 3P’s are Planning, Practice, and Performance. I might add, Performance incorporated with enhancement techniques that I will cover within my future speeches and writings. For now, I am the little boy on stage at Booker, T. that is facing his public speaking f.e.a.r. Yet he now knows that fear is nothing more than a word that deserves to be masticated.(http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/masticate?db=dictionary)

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In Psalms of Life, A Poem by H.W. Longfellow

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Longfellow portrait powered by Wikipedia.org

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882)
A PSALM OF LIFE

WHAT THE HEART OF THE YOUNG MAN
SAID TO THE PSALMIST

TELL me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream ! ?
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real ! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal ;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way ;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.

Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.

In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle !
Be a hero in the strife !

Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant !
Let the dead Past bury its dead !
Act,? act in the living Present !
Heart within, and God o'erhead !

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time ;

Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate ;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

*Courtesy of http://www.potw.org/archive/potw232.html




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The above poem was first published in the Knickerbocker Magazine in October 1838. It also appeared in Longfellow's first published collection Voices in the Night. It can be found, for example, in:
Longfellow, Henry Wadsworth. The Complete Poetical Works of Longfellow. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1893.

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