What You See is What You Get

by Andre V Milteer, M.A.
(Central Texas, USA)

Andre V Milteer, M.A.

Andre V Milteer, M.A.

Today, I had the pleasure to speak to a group of 10 Amazing Young People. These individuals had met some difficult life challenges. Yet, 9:00 am, there they were; listening to my speech. I was followed by two other Incredible Speakers in their own right.


A common theme was Encouragement, Positive Thinking, and Deep Faith in God. I was blown away that all three speakers, me included, were on the same page of music. I wasn't the only one dwelling on this theme. Hey, maybe there's more to this way of thinking; I thought to myself.

Foundational to any success in work, life, or love, begins and ends with a Positive self-image. This concept has been around for years. Brian Tracy calls it, The Law of Self-Concept. Whatever, ya wanna call it; three speakers were preaching and teaching the exact same message.

What I find most amazing, is that we are not sabotaged by our status, breaks, or background. We are done in by us...the stuff between our two ears. Our thinking hurts our success more than any other phenomenon. Some have referred to this thinking style as Stinkin Thinking.

Lastly, I invite all of you, to work on your faith in the power of the intangible...what cannot be realized by touch/taste/smell.

Faith believes that something will come into the tangible (realness) even before it happens. This Vision is a Power as manifested by the depth of one's imagination. Then we pull that faith and mix it with hard work. Finally, we connect and incorporate with the Divine...Our God and Source. Things will begin to happen...truly!

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3 Proven Steps to Eliminating Your F.E.A.R. Of Public Speaking

by Andre V Milteer, M.A.
(Texas, USA)

Andre V. Milteer, M.A.

Andre V. Milteer, M.A.

Your F.E.A.R.
How many of us have an INTENSE fear of public speaking. A Show of hands, Please…

If you all don’t experience f.e.a.r. when speaking, you’re either lying to yourselves or to lying to yourselves. Truth is, I have an INTENSE f.e.a.r. of public speaking. Indulge me for the next few minutes while I lead us down the path of the exploration of f.e.a.r.

The Dark side of Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

Darkness has been linked to evil, bad, and negative events. True or True? Ok…so let me ask, where does this come from. Answer, Our Childhood…Freud’s ultimate psycho-sexual stages of development. Let me tell you all a story…May I?

Once upon a time (1965), there was a little 5 y/o boy. One guess who that boy was…ME! The boy was asked to give a graduation speech by his kindergarten teacher. Of course, the little boy replied, I’m scared; Teacher…But I’ll do it for you!

The boy, aka ME, practiced and practiced until he had the speech “down cold.” His dress rehearsals were hitch less upon drilling in front of peers within the kindergarten house. Until the day of…

The Boy was transported to a Large building. The building has a marquis...the boy was very smart, and read the words, BOOKER…T…WASHINGTON…HIGH SCHOOL. Yes, y’all are correct; the boy’s speech was to be delivered within the High School Auditorium. For you see, The Boy was the Valedictorian.

The Seeds of Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

The Boy was frightened…Scratch that, HE WAS TERRIFIED. The stage was monstrous; the auditorium was Vast and dark (there’s that word again, DARK). And to top it off, the boy was required to deliver the Keynote (he hadn’t rehearsed the sequence). The Boy went out, faced the crowd, began crying, and FROZE. Then, the ultimate symbol of f.e.a.r. and embarrassment occurred. He literally… wet his pants…pause for effect

Just What is F.e.a.r.?

Granted, most would-be speakers don’t experience this type of trauma…This type of what_______? Yet ALL experience some degree of f.e.a.r. What is f.e.a.r.? Definitions anyone_____? Here is mine: False Evidence Appearing Real. Also within this category, I must include Fear’s Ugly Twin Sisters, Doubt, and Worry (sorry ladies; no offense intended). Motivational Speaker, Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup Book series co-author) terms the F in f.e.a.r. as Fantasizing, E..A.R. In other words, DOUBT & WORRY. In others words, What Folks, _____! Thank-you.

What are we worried about?
1) Forgetting our speech?
2) Losing our nerve?
3) Looking Stupid…
How about this one, peeing in our…Ok, worst case scenario, one or ALL of the above happens! Sure, we’re devastated and embarrassed. Yet, it’s within moments such as these, that we grow and excel…provided, we neuro-linguistically re-frame this Significant Emotional Event (SEE) as an opportunity vs. disaster. (Easier said than done…agreed?)

Let Me Tell You The Parable of Satan and St. Peter

Way back in the bowels of time, Satan and St. Peter were having a conversation about the Temptation of Man. St. Peter postulated the merits of (Hu)Mankind’s redemption, acceptance, and everlasting place with the Kingdom of Heaven. Satan, fortified his position by accentuating Man’s weakness, temptation, and selfishness.

St. Peter wasn’t swayed, annoyed, nor afraid…for He knew that his powers were superior to that of Satan. Moreover, Satan remained confident, because he had a secret and very potent weapon within his arsenal. As a source of pride and vanity, Satan decided to share his secret with St. Peter. So without hesitation, he began…
Of all the powers, tricks, and allure that I could use to capture the Soul of Man, there are only TWO that I rely most upon. Yes, they are my Pride & Joy. And, they are…

FEAR and her Ugly Twin Sister, DOUBT. For you see, once I’m able to plant these seeds into the Thoughts of Man, my work is done. Because, you see, I can simply sit back and relax. (Hu)Man him/herself, will themselves, be the cause of their Own undoing.

The 3 Step Formulas for Conquering Public Speaking f.e.a.r.

How many, via show-of-hands, believe that we could spend an entire day, week, month, year, or lifetime exploring strategies and drills to overcome public speaking f.e.a.r. Yes, of course we could. Yet, how many minutes do we actually have right now…Anyone____5-7__?

So, here’s the secret bottled sauce formula to conquering public speaking f.e.a.r. in 3 easy steps. Everyone Ready?
1) P
2) P
3) P
Sum Total= 3…Yes, It’s the 3 P’s. Go back to my earlier analogy/demonstration of the little boy wetting… A wise old {Toastmaster} once said, “Piss-Poor Planning leads to Piss-Poor Performance.” Stated in an other fashion, I give you, Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance.

The 3P’s are Planning, Practice, and Performance. I might add, Performance incorporated with enhancement techniques that I will cover within my future speeches and writings. For now, I am the little boy on stage at Booker, T. that is facing his public speaking f.e.a.r. Yet he now knows that fear is nothing more than a word that deserves to be masticated.

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Return to Invitation 4.

Slow Dance, Poem written by a Teenager with Cancer

by Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor
(Bronx, New York)

This is a poem written by a teenager with cancer.

She wants to see how many people get her poem. It is quite the poem. Please pass it on.

This poem was written by a terminally ill young girl in a New York Hospital. It was sent by a medical doctor; Make sure to read what is in the closing statement, AFTER THE POEM.
======================================================
SLOW DANCE

Have you ever watched kids On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down. Don't dance so fast.
Time is short; The music won't last.

Do you run through each day On the fly? When they ask, How are you? Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, Do you lie in your bed? With the next hundred chores, Running through your head?

You'd better slow down; Don't dance so fast. Time is short...The music won't last.

Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say, Hi!

You'd better slow down; Don't dance so fast. Time is short...The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere, You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day, It is like an unopened gift....thrown away.

Life is not a race...Do take it slower.
Hear the music, Before the song is over.
=======================================================
Dear All:
PLEASE pass this mail on to everyone you know - even to those you don't know! It is the request of a special girl who will soon leave this world due to cancer.

This young girl has 6 months left to live,
and as her dying wish, she wanted to send a letter telling everyone to live their life to the fullest, since she never will.

She'll never make it to prom, graduate from high school,
or get married and have a family of her own.

By sharing this Poem with as many people as
possible, you can give her and her family a little hope, because with every name that this is sent to, The American Cancer Society will donate 3 cents per name
to her treatment and recovery plan.

One guy sent this to 500 people! So I know that we can at least send it to 5 or 6. It's not even your money, just your time!

PLEASE PASS ON AS A LAST REQUEST:

Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor
Department of Developmental and
Molecular Biology
1300 Morris Park Avenue
Bronx, New York 10461

Please pass this on.

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